"You're stupid, you should know this, because you clarealy don't know then I'll have to treat you as a kid". I feel stupid, I'm not good enough, I should know better by now, you're the shadow of the new girl, she's so much better than you! She clarealy gets more compliments than you do. You should be better, you can't have this level after 9 months of doing the same. You're not good enough, not good enough... I wanna cry when I get exposed to my colleagues, I feel like having 6 years old again. I can feel the anxiety in my body, can feel my throat slowly closing, I feel my heart rate up on the roof, I feel numbness on my extremities. I wanna hide, wanna disappear, wanna quit, want to go home and hide under my blanket.
"You're not good at your job, other people are better than you are"
I feel so stupid... you're not good enough. I wanna cry, can feel it in my throat, you suck... dumb, dumb dumb, dumb.
Is this PMS, lack of thyrozol or just my regular mood?
Stop... I wanna go home, take off this uniform and leave the show.
But I'm waiting in this cell because I have to know... Have I been guilty all this time?
